I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Randomize
