so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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