it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
she pinky promised me she was 18
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
