i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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