watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Two words: blizzard sex
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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