hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize