I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
