...so i touched it.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
