nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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