I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
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