Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
