How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
