I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
