ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
