you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
