we have officially lost it.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
