Sponge bath it is.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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