i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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