He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
