..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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