I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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