I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
