He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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