I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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