i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
