Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
