do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
