and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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