The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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