tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
