who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize