why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
