u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
