so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
