I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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