wanna go halves on a baby?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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