It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
my being single is dangerous.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
