There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
