even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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