Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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