I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize