I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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