Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Threesome in a minivan. New low
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
