why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I lost the right to judge tonight
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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