I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I love having hate sex.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
