ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
