She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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