so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
