Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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