You're so nebulous sometimes
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize